what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Randomize