HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
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