I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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