): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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