16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
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