Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
the day after is always just damage control
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Randomize
