her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
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