I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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