Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I believe in your delicious
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
