I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
