He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
3 2 1 whiskey
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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