omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
