At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
