she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
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