As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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