booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
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