im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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