there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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