Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I have aggressive nipples.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Randomize
