We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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