I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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