I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
