how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Randomize