It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
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