Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
