Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
