you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
