I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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