Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize