Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
