According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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