hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
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