the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
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