Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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