these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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