On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
