you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
operation harelip BJ is a go
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
bring money and cleavage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
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