she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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