yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
