I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
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