Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
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