seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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