if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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