dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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