i was rollin on her like bob the builder
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
There was a lot of him and a little penis
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Send help, water and tortillas.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
