end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I love you. Go after that dick
Randomize