The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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