Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Randomize
