I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
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