No, you can still breathe under the balls.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize