Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
BRING THE BAGELS
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Randomize
