Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
this hospital has no fireball
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
