A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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