my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
