Me too!
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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