He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
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